Closed minded people
in denial of the battles
and emotions people face.
The second I open up about my mental illness
and let my feelings out,
I get treated like I’m possessed
or that I don’t have faith.
What you’ve seen before wasn’t fake,
it just wasn’t all of me.
I kept part of me in the closet
and still part of me remains there.
Because, you wouldn’t be able to handle or accept that.
And, I stayed in that closet out of fear that I would be rejected again.
That I would be judged again.
But, oh-
you closed minded people,
you don’t understand
that God loves me and accepts me just how I am.
He doesn’t need you to judge me for him.
He feels my pain.
He feels my torture.
He hurts that I hurt and it hurts him to see you push me away.
And, I refused to leave God because of people!
I’ll express my emotions.
We’re all human.
If my emotions offend you than maybe you need a mirror.
And, don’t you dare doubt my faith in God-
I do enough of that myself.
I’m glad you’ve never felt pain like I have
because, if you did you wouldn’t be alive.
Everyone has struggled from time to time,
but not everyone wants to die,
plans to die.
Not everyone actually attempts or completed suicide.
So, you closed minded people,
I pray you never have to have an experience like mine.
Next time I go to express my feelings,
please-
don’t say anything unless you have love to give.
Must I always be the bigger person ignoring your comments?
Words hurt.
But, I’m not rubber and you’re not glue.
Words don’t bounce off of me and stick to you.
Words bypass your brain and fall out of your mouth straight into my heart,
and it takes great effort on my part to patch up the scars your words left.
This poem isn’t to one specific person,
but if the shoe fits you might as well grab that mirror and do some self reflection.
I’m not perfect by no means.
Do I really have the right to talk?
I give myself permission to feel these emotions.
I give myself permission to express my emotions.
I will not apologize for offending you.
I will only apologize for offending me.
I’m sorry to myself for not being kind.
I’m sorry to myself for being a doormat.
I’m sorry to myself for not allowing
myself to be authentic.
I’ve said a lot in this poem.
I’m sure you’re just as lost as me.
To the close minded people still reading this,
may your life be changed for the better.
If you make a comment out of spite,
that’s on you for proving my point.

Jesus<3MGP

#M&MsPoetry